Your Daddy

You will be okay. I promise. Life goes on. That’s going to take a while to realize, but most of all…accept. 

You’ll grieve him before he goes. So much. You won’t be able to face friends and coworkers often because although they care (so much), they will ask. They will ask how your dad is and how you are, and you never have a good answer for them.

You’ll have regrets. You’ll waste time being anxious, waiting for the inevitable phone call. 

You’ll love him. You’ll love him like you always have and even more because you know you don’t have him much longer. 

And when he’s gone, you will miss him more than anything. You’ll be so strong recently after his passing that you’ll amaze yourself. He always told you that you were smarter and stronger than you ever thought. 

And after a couple months, you’ll sit down, and every single wall you’ve built up until this point will fall. You’ll find every emotional song he loved, and you’ll listen. You’ll cry. You’ll cry so much. 

You’ll question your religious beliefs and hope Heaven is everything he thought it would be while wondering if he’s reacquainting himself with friends and family who were in his life before you were even born. 

You’ll wonder what’s in store for your life because you finally realized it goes on. The joy, happiness, and humor isn’t gone. It’s just going to appear in different ways, and no matter how it shows itself, your dad will always be there. He will be a part of every happy moment until you see each other again. 

One Year Can Change Your Life

I was the girl who was afraid to raise her hand in class even though she knew she had the right answer. I stashed trash at my desk to throw away as I walked out because I was too self conscious to walk in front of the class. I didn’t have friends that had the same lunch hour as me, so I sat in a bathroom stall and ate my lunch. 

But around my family, around my friends, I didn’t care. I didn’t care about my size, my clothes, my hair and makeup. I was me. I was so talkative around my family that my mom and dad would say “Kara, you’re doing it” when I talked too much. 

But…people change. Now, I don’t care. If you don’t like me, you don’t know me. I wear my heart on my sleeve, along with everyone else’s. I care so deeply for the people I love, the people I’ve briefly met, and people I don’t even know. 

Sometimes I tell myself I wish I knew then what I know now. I wish I felt then how I felt now. But, if I did, would I be who I am right now, at this very moment? Absolutely not. 

We make mistakes. We show up. We show out, just to show ourselves the good and bad parts of us. Do I have regrets? In theory, yes. But again, I’ve lived, I’ve learned, and I’ve changed. 

People are shocked when I tell them the story about eating lunch in the bathroom. But, it is what it is. I’ve learned to be who I am and who I love to be. I am 100-percent me, and that is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. 

I’m Thankful for Me!

I’ve been pretty absent from the blog for awhile, as I mostly focus on documenting my journey on TikTok, so here’s an update!

I am down 118 pounds since starting my weight loss journey on March 4 of this year. I began taking a prescription weight loss medication called Phentermine. I also started focusing on my nutrition and exercise by counting calories and working out 6 days per week. 

I started counting calories with the MyFitnessPal app. I am also a fast food addict, so I promised myself I would stop eating fried food. As far as physical fitness goes, I started out walking around the block. The next day, I walked a tiny bit farther, then a little farther the next day, and so on, and so on. Now, I am proud to say I am up to THREE miles, and honestly, I could probably do more than that. 

My year has also been filled with several vacations. I got to see Chicago, Charleston, SC, and OBX! I had so much fun on all of my trips, and while I did not go insane with my calorie intake, I did give myself a break from the workouts. 

Fast forward to October. My success was so swift and steady up until that point. From the beginning, I told myself this journey is for life, and I meant it. Through a six week plateau of losing ZERO pounds, I fought. I stuck to my workouts, ate well, and kept telling myself that even though the scale wasn’t budging, I was still improving my life and getting healthier everyday. 

I am so incredibly proud of myself. In the past, a plateau is where I would just give up. I would throw in the towel, say “eff it,” and speed to McDonald’s. Not anymore!

This morning, I was down three pounds! My hard work was so worth it, and it always will be, even when the scale or the tape measure may not reflect that. 

As we started cooking the Thanksgiving meal today, my aunt showed me a picture she was saving. 

This picture was from June. I had already lost 70 pounds, and I still looked miserable!

So today, I am thankful for my health. I am thankful for my dedication and will power. I am thankful for all I’ve done for myself and how far I have come. 

Now, let’s eat. Happy Thanksgiving!

Believe it Does

It’s so hard to look at yourself and see everything everyone else sees. 

You’re great

You’re pretty. 

You’re talented. 

You’re dedicated. 

You do some things people only

wish they could do. 

Open your eyes, girl. 

Look at not what’s right in front of you, but what’s in you. You got this. You’re strong enough for this. I promise you. 

You have been through and will go through worse. You’ve experienced things some people haven’t experienced, and you’ve had a better life than others have. 

Just because your life is different doesn’t make it any better or worse than others’. 

Life is crazy. It throws you curve balls and makes you think you can’t handle it, but sometimes it throws you home runs. Some of those you experienced early in life, and some are still yet to come. 

Just be patient, sweet girl. Believe in yourself. Believe in life. Believe that it gets better, because I promise you it does. 

Give Yourself Three Months

I’ve always seen the quote that says “It takes 4 weeks for you to notice, 8 weeks for your friends to notice, and 12 weeks for the rest of the world to notice the change.” However, this time, it has taken me months to notice the results of the hard work I’ve put in. 

Give yourself three months. No matter what it is. Whether you’re trying to lose weight like me, learn an instrument, be better at a sport, anything! Just give yourself THREE months, and I promise it will be worth it. 

I gave myself three months, and now I know I can’t give up. The amount I’ve changed mentally and physically is astounding to me. I have wanted to give up so many times throughout the last few months. There were days I gained weight, days I was so depressed I hated myself, and days I wondered if all of my hard work was even going to be even a tiny bit worth it. 

Well, it was worth it. It IS worth it. The reason I started this blog was so I could remember what it was like when it was all just a goal. It’s so important to remember where you came from so you can never go back there again, and only three months into my journey, I can tell you that I am so much happier where I am now. 

I’ve worked so hard, and although I’ve not yet reached my ultimate goal, I am so pleased with the progress I’ve made. It’s been a rough few months, but today, I realized all of the sweat and tears wasn’t for nothing. You can’t change overnight, and although it seems like a lifetime, it all goes by so fast in the end. So, enjoy the ride, and please, PLEASE give yourself at least three months.